Many years ago I appeared in a profound and provocative theatrical happening called "Dennis and the Ultimate Sandwich". Modesty forbids me from telling you who I played (it was Dennis!!). Dennis was a young (desperately handsome) man afflicted by some kind of ennui and looking for answers. You know the type. Every now and then a mysterious character would appear and dispense pearls of wisdom. This was played by my real life sensei, Andrew Walker. Life imitating art.

The play featured a sandwich. I seem to recall it was two slices of Mothers Pride and loads of smarties: that's the kind of renegade theatre it was. I don't remember what happened when I ate the ultimate sandwich. Probably some form of enlightenment or at least alignment with the human condition. I moved on. Other interpretations of the eternal Dennis/Sandwich story came along. Governments rose and fell. Over the years the memory of this all faded.

Until today.

Today I went for lunch at Fuzzy's Grub in Bow Lane. When I saw the lady assembling my sandwich I had a sudden flashback to the Bedlam Theatre, Edinburgh. Once again I was Dennis. And this was truly the ultimate sandwich!

my... sweet.... lord....



That's good eatin'. It's a terrible idea for lunch though - I was desperate for a sleep all afternoon!